you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
This house was built for laser tag.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
