Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize