I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
