you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
