Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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