I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
