Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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