So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
