normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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