I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
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