I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
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All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
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Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
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