I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
