Porn is love you can see.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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