The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
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