we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
