So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize