I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
is that a dick in a sweater?
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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