I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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