Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
