The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Randomize