HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Randomize
