She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take back everything I said about communal showers
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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