so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
