The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
