No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Say something about gay babies.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
