Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
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