Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize