it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Tornado booty call.. dedication
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
