just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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