I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
His hands were made for my vagina.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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