And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
You pole danced in your parka.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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