I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
