Texts From Last Night

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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  dude, you're being a jerk.

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney

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  (704): dude, you're being a jerk. (919): sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney http://tfl.nu/o9rt
  Replies (6) Good night (947) Bad night (560)
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  (310): View more from California

  This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.

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  (310): This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina. http://tfl.nu/e7vz
  Replies (17) Good night (844) Bad night (4212)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign

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  (630): I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign http://tfl.nu/tzlz
  Replies (18) Good night (4851) Bad night (824)
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  (716): View more from New York

  She's like a pop up book from hell.

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  (716): She's like a pop up book from hell. http://tfl.nu/grf5
  Replies (18) Good night (1084) Bad night (4138)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.

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  (702): And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now. http://tfl.nu/so7u
  Replies (7) Good night (879) Bad night (3378)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA

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  (954): STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA http://tfl.nu/oiv6
  Replies (21) Good night (1522) Bad night (3883)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.

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  (513): Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen. http://tfl.nu/spnv
  Replies (2) Good night (877) Bad night (1844)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.

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  (402): let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him. http://tfl.nu/l9xp
  Replies (8) Good night (3039) Bad night (662)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.

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  (307): Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse. http://tfl.nu/w9b1
  Replies (2) Good night (1701) Bad night (542)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.

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  (605): I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more. http://tfl.nu/w7nf
  Replies (14) Good night (1465) Bad night (948)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.

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  (206): be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age. http://tfl.nu/oer4
  Replies (10) Good night (1101) Bad night (496)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...

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  (250): I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes... http://tfl.nu/uyv6
  Replies (4) Good night (1147) Bad night (449)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  I just really need a hug and a shower beer

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  (512): I just really need a hug and a shower beer http://tfl.nu/4ssr
  Replies (5) Good night (951) Bad night (689)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.

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  (619): He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft. http://tfl.nu/kmfz
  Replies (1) Good night (364) Bad night (798)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!

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  (210): He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!! http://tfl.nu/ekhg
  Replies (1) Good night (474) Bad night (291)

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