but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
