what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
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Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
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I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
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