so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
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