Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
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