I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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