spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
