That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
