from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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