Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Randomize
