Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize