ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.