and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
He better not be in your backpack
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize