dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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