Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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