I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
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