what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
