Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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