I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Randomize